Stupidity Crisis » Chris

U.S. Kids Too Fat to Fight

Chris — Tue, 04 May 2010 01:21:27 +0000

I am speechless, but my drill sergeants warned us about this way back in 2001. We’re the video game generation they said. Nobody gets and exercise anymore they said…

“Is chow allowed in the barracks private Pyle?”

“Sir, No Sir!”

“Are you allowed to eat Jelly Donuts private Pyle?”

“Sir, No Sir!”

“Any why not?”

“Sir… because I’m too heavy, Sir!”

“Because you are a DISGUSTING FATBODY private Pyle!”

Rising rates of obesity among young Americans could pose a risk to the future of the military, two retired generals are warning.

John Shalikashvili and Hugh Shelton, both former chairmen of the US Joint Chiefs of Staff, wrote in the Washington Post: “Obesity rates threaten the overall health of America and the future strength of our military.

“We consider this problem so serious from a national security perspective that we have joined more than 130 other retired generals, admirals and senior military leaders in calling on Congress to pass new child nutrition legislation.”

They say more than a quarter of American youth are now too fat to fight and that weight is ruling out more potential recruits than any other medical factor.

From nzherald.co.nz. Read the full article.

The Amazing Amega Wand

Chris — Wed, 14 Apr 2010 02:51:47 +0000

Here’s a lovely review site about the Amega Wand, a device that uses zero point energy to remind your cells where they came from (no, I am not making this shit up, but someone out there is… and it’s working).

Courtesy of the same site, here is a numbered list of uses for this device which retails at an MSRP of over $300 (but can be yours for $99 if you act now):

1.Discharges blockages in your body allowing universal life force energy to have a clear path to flow.

2. Removes the distortions in your Bio energetic Field.

3. Reminds the cells where they originated and promotes the body’s own self healing.

4. Energizes your food and drink which will in turn increase the potency of the minerals and vitamins within them.

5. Use it on your pets and foliage to supplement any energy deficiencies that they may have.

6. Balances and energizes any imbalances that your body may be experiencing

7. Helps to remove aches, pains and discomforts from accidents, arthritus, bruises, nasal passage blockage, tinnitus, tendinitis and virtually any other pain you may be experiencing.

8. Energizes your surroundings within your own dwelling as well as those around you.

Proofreading fail: “I’ve had bad knee pain for quite some time due to a car wreck and with in a couple minutes my paid was gone.”
Enjoy these videos, and get your hands on an Amega Wand today!

Global Warming – Doomsday Called Off

Chris — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 03:10:05 +0000

“We’ve made ourselves a very poor experiment. We started to observe meteorology at the coldest spot in the last 10,000 years.”

Healthcare Headline Alludes to Penis Envy

Chris — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 14:32:06 +0000

Ha!

I have no idea what newspaper this is from. It was ripped from a friend’s wall on facebook, who ripped it from a friend of his. If you know where it came from, please chime in.

Tebow’s pre-Wonderlic prayer request falls flat

Chris — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 14:55:51 +0000

Tim Tebow requested that everyone in his test taking group bow their heads in prayer, and the response he got was:
“Shut the fuck up.”

Full Article

Spirit of Truth

Chris — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 13:43:35 +0000

This guy has been a staple on the interwebs for quite some time now. If you haven’t received his biblical teachings set to early 90′s west coast Gangsta Rap and R&B, then you HAVE to watch this video and become enlightened.

The Basic Laws of Human Stupidity

Chris — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 08:23:59 +0000

This is an awesome article I remember coming across sometime in 2005. It stuck, and no matter how many times I go back and read it, it is still captivating.

Basically, it breaks down humans into four categories: Helpless, Intelligent, Bandit, and Stupid. When you start to analyze the interactions between these groups as specified, you will find yourself saying “I know someone exactly like that!”

The first basic law of human stupidity asserts without ambiguity that:

Always and inevitably everyone underestimates the number of stupid individuals in circulation.

Read on…

The Basic Laws of Human Stupidity

Money Creation

Chris — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 13:11:53 +0000

This is part of an awesome series about our monetary system called “Crash Course.” Once it explains the basics of how money works and is created, it shows you how our current money supply is expanding exponentially, and we are headed for BIG problems.

Stupid in America – Awesome Moustache

Chris — Mon, 15 Mar 2010 23:54:27 +0000

Woman Tries for Fatness World Record

Chris — Mon, 15 Mar 2010 21:06:43 +0000

This is news… A New Jersey Woman trying to set a world record for fatness. After some discussion, we decided that this link did indeed belong on stupiditycrisis.com for two reasons:

1 – Somehow this woman’s quest is newsworthy, because idiots like us will read it.

2 – “In order to pay for the enormous amounts of food she is eating — her weekly grocery bill is $815 — Ms Simpson makes money by running a website where men pay to watch her consume fast food.”

Yay internets.

http://news.ninemsn.com.au/world/1027360/woman-aims-to-become-worlds-fattest